Reasons to Hate Manchester United

A few years ago, there were many Arsenal fans who were actually openly rooting for Manchester United to overhaul Chelsea for the Premier League crown. The reasoning, I guess, was because they detested Mourinho’s nouveau riche Chelsea. They figured, if we weren’t going to be champions, please don’t let it be Chelsea. A couple of years later, the same dilemma greeted Arsenal fans viewing the Champions League final. Even though Manchester United would have achieved a historic double on the 50th anniversary of Munich, the same type of Arsenal fan rooted for Manchester United. They wanted Arsenal to be the first London based club to win the Champions League.

I am not one of these people. To cut to the chase, I detest Manchester United with every fiber of my being. I hate them. Unless they approach me, you won’t see me say a word to a United fan. Along with Tottenham, they are the club I want to beat the most.

There’s nothing wrong with being a new Arsenal fan. As long as you support the club with your heart, I have no problems with it. But, the attitude towards Chelsea belong solely to the new Arsenal fans. That must be rectified soon.

These are few of the reasons I hate Manchester United:

– Sir Alex Ferguson, the “dustbin man who looks like Taggart”. Personally, I find it highly irritating that Wenger and Ferguson are somewhat cordial now. I’d rather they hated each other’s guts.

– They humiliated us at the Emirates last year in the second leg of the Champions League semifinal.

– Patrice Evra. His comments about our squad being comprised of babies should have been met with a swift slide tackle from behind. The fact that he complained he was targeted by our players (with tackles that weren’t nasty enough for my liking) makes him sound like a baby.

– They clinched the title against us last year, forcing Cesc Fabregas to extend his congratulations to the aforementioned Taggart.

– Ryan Giggs, the Welsh Sheep Shagger. The image of his goal against us in the 1999 FA Cup semifinal will never be forgotten. I don’t care if he’s never played in a World Cup. The woman who was caught on camera giving him the finger while he was taking a corner is a legend. She’s a true Gooner.

– They can potentially win a record-breaking fourth Premier League title in a row while surpassing Liverpool for total triumphs.

– Darren Fletcher. How a player becomes this overrated is a result of British pundits who confuse effort with actual skill. A couple of years ago, United fans didn’t even want to see him in their team. Now, he’s compared with Roy Keane. That comparison makes me laugh and vomit at the same time.

– Their fans are sensitive bullies. Calling a manager a paedophile is something they do with pride; it’s become so routine that it doesn’t even bother us anymore (even if it’s still greatly offensive). During the Carling Cup semifinal second leg, a section of fans at Old Trafford made machine gun gestures at Emmanuel Adebayor. Clearly, I am no fan of Adebayor, but those are pathetic actions by cowards. The same group of cowards who if other groups of fans mention the words “airplane” and “Munich” can’t take the heat.

– Nani. He could have been crippled by Mathieu Flamini after showboating against us during the FA Cup two years ago. Had he connected, Flamini would have been banned for at least eight games. It would have been worth it.

– They snatched Chris Smalling from us. Smalling, who was an Arsenal fan growing up, somehow decided to snub us and join “the biggest club in the world” instead. I now hope he fails and that Aaron Ramsey leads Wales to the World Cup after Ryan Giggs retires.

– Wayne Rooney. He dived to end our 49 match unbeaten streak. The contrast between how Cristiano Ronaldo and Wayne Rooney are judged says everything. A man who would kiss the United badge in front of the same Everton fans who worshipped him is clearly a scumbag.

If those aren’t enough reasons, I’m sure we can think of more. Please feel free to list more in the comments section.

As I sit here typing this, I can’t help but look forward to the match on Sunday.

A true culture of hate for Manchester United must be a requirement for any Arsenal fan. Players like Ryan Giggs, Paul Scholes, Gary Neville, and Rio Ferdinand hate Arsenal. It’s time to have some of our players show that sort of hatred. I want that to see that type of anger on Sunday.

Nothing would make me more happy than to start our run towards the Premier League title by destroying them at the Emirates.

Sunday. I. Can’t. Fucking. Wait.

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